Theater of the absurd.

The news is absurd. It doesn't matter whether I read it or watch it on TV. It doesn't matter what channel I watch or which newspaper I read. It doesn't matter what part of the world they are talking about. Examples:

• In December global warning brings us record cold in Europe and tornadoes in the US.
• The solution to avoiding the fiscal cliff is to (a) deny that it matters, (b) blame it on the other party, or (c) be rich enough to afford a parachute. Meanwhile we are about to hit the debt limit before we fall over the cliff. The fiscal cliff was created to force us to solve the debt problem. Is it time to consult the Greeks on how to solve our nation's financial problems?
• Iran is grounding all air travel during the five daily times of prayer, but that time varies all over the world. I guess Allah never intended us to fly.
• The solution to gun violence is more guns, according to the NRA. Others think it is fewer bullets per gun.
• Housing developers are finally figuring out that the problem with the housing market is that we can no longer afford mansions. Their solution is to construct mansions with two front entrances so that two generations can live in the same house.
• Toyota has agreed to dole out $1.1 billion (that's nine zeroes) and a "Sorry" to customers who had faulty floor mats in their cars.
• Russia is banning Americans from adopting Russian orphans. Meanwhile available orphans in America are ignored. What's the problem?
• "Homicides in NYC near 50-year low." Does anyone actually live in NYC or have they all moved to Connecticut?
• Gun owners in New York State are upset that a local newspaper published a map allowing people to identify homes where guns are registered. What's the problem? I thought the point of owning a gun was to scare the bad guys away.
• Stores are offering big post-Christmas discounts to shoppers whose expectations of those discounts stopped them from buying the stuff in the first place. Doesn't that sound like a scenario that could be applied to the fiscal cliff negotiations?